


Three Great Loves

by PadaWinBaby



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, Relearning how to love after loss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-09-05 15:24:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16813360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PadaWinBaby/pseuds/PadaWinBaby
Summary: Some say you only get one great love in your life. Steve got two. But the only thing greater than living in love is celebrating a love you once had with the only other person who would ever know how you'd felt.





	Three Great Loves

Three Great Loves

1.

James Buchanan Barnes fell in love with Steven Grant Rogers when he was 15 years old. The winter had been unusually cold that year, and the building super hadn't paid the gas bill, so there was no heater to curl up to in the little studio the boys shared. They'd been given some ratty old blankets at the Catholic mission, but Steve still shivered. Bucky hated how thin and sickly his friend was, not because it was inconvenient, but because it worried him that any moment could spell the end for that blue-eyed blonde.

“Hey Buck, remember the bonfire we went to last summer?” Steve asked, voice shuddering with his body. “Remember the beach? The sand was so warm, and the sun was so bright.” 

Bucky remembered. He'd been invited by some girls from school and he'd brought Steve along, because that's what he did. The kid had enjoyed himself, but Bucky had spent most of the evening deflecting the disdain and jokes at Steve's expense that had circulated among the very people who'd invited Bucky out. 

Steve whimpered, pulling the thin wool blanket closer around his thin shoulders. Bucky's heart panged, and he pulled Steve into the circle of his arms, surrounding Steve’s small frame with his own. It was still cold, but it helped them both. In the morning, Bucky was woken by cold sunlight and warm lips. 

~

The first months were difficult for Bucky. He'd lived inside the skin of the Winter Soldier for so long that it was reflexive to slip into Russian without hesitation, or to stand at attention in front of desks to await instruction, or to train the madman he was sometimes certain he must be. Even looking at Steve was hard.

Every time Bucky's tortured gaze fell on the other man, the frail, shivering boy of their youth was overlaid on the symbol of freedom that was Captain America. The look of empathy and pity that entered those impossible blue eyes when their eyes met was overwhelming on too many levels to count, and he always found himself swiftly finding something else to look at. 

It was a cold November night when Steve caught him in the hall, the man's broad shoulders blocking his way past. “Do you remember the bonfire we went to that summer?” Steve asked, voice husky and intimate. “Remember the beach?”

Bucky still couldn't look him in the eye, so he focused on the crook of Steve's elbow. “The sand was so warm, and the sun was so bright,” he quoted. He took a deep breath and licked his lips, looking up at Steve's face. “You got so sunburned, we both thought you were dying.”

That seemed to be the right answer, because then Steve's hands were holding Bucky's face, and they were kissing like they'd never stopped. 

2.

Tony Stark was a bitter, jaded pile of human garbage - or so Happy would have you believe - when he first met the anachronistic man pulled from the ice. At first, it was a struggle not to hate him, knowing that this was the creation his father was proudest of, not him. But as he coached the big blonde through adapting to his new environment, he began to connect with him and, eventually, adore him. 

It was as Tony was out doing some not-so-stealthy Christmas shopping and agonizing over ensuring Steve got the perfect gift that he realized maybe he loved the big lug. But he kept it to himself, because that's what he did. And on Christmas morning, when Steve opened the antique chess set and sweater Tony gave him, and those blue eyes sparkled at him, Tony could swear he died. He put away quite a bit of eggnog that night, so when he cornered Rogers under the mistletoe, he grabbed a fistful of that colorful cashmere sweater he'd put on immediately, and fit his lips to Steve's with every expectation of being pushed away. He wasn't.

Tony woke the next morning with a pounding headache and a sense that the world had changed. He was the little spoon, nestled in the curve of Steve's body. The next several days saw Steve making time in his schedule to hang around the lab with Tony and Bruce, and inviting Tony to join him on his discovery of modern pop culture. And at night, after Steve and Jarvis had finished dinner, Tony and Steve fell into bed together with laughter and light. It was the healthiest, and certainly the longest, relationship Tony had ever had. 

It was probably fitting, then, that their first fight sparked something of a civil war, and that the breakup that ensued affected the whole team. And it was most certainly karma that the day they both independently decided that they needed each other much more than their opinions differed, Steve came to see him at work and was killed before Tony could ever offer him the ring he'd chosen.

3.

When Tony was first introduced to Bucky, there had been a lot of negative emotions going around. But there tended to be negative emotions when you stood face-to-face with the man responsible for the death of your parents and were told by your boyfriend, who was best friends with him, that you weren't allowed to kill him back. Blind rage drove him to do and say things he shouldn't have, including attempting to murder his boyfriend on the streets of New York. 

After Steve's death, though, Bucky became the only person Tony could talk to who could understand what he was going through. Bucky, after all, had lost Steve twice. Tony spent entire days with him, sitting around and talking about Steve. They shared stories of loving him and caring for him, and being cared for in return. 

At some point, their talks turned to other topics, their hearts healing enough that they could be people again outside of their memories. They both enthused about cars and guns, approaching the topics from very different angles, but nonetheless finding common ground. Talking turning to doing things together, like watching movies or taking art classes. 

Bucky made the first move, surprisingly. They were three deep on a horror marathon, drinking beer and relaxing, Bucky's metal arm stashed up in his room for the night. He wasn't sure when his eyes strayed from the screen, but at some point he found himself studying Tony’s profile. He was undeniably handsome, and Bucky could see a lot of what Steve must have seen in him. Something pivotal happened onscreen, and Tony turned his head to see Bucky's reaction, and Bucky lunged across the space between, kissing the other man sloppily. Tony was startled, pushing him away for a moment with a wild look in his eyes, but then they were kissing again. 

Nothing they did was gentle or sweet, as it had been with Steve. What they had was fueled by the madness of grief and cold desperation, tearing, biting, scratching. When they were done, and Tony laid his head on Bucky's chest among the furniture they'd moved, tears sprang to their eyes. Tony felt guilty, naturally, as if he'd somehow betrayed Steve by sleeping with the man’s best friend. Bucky, though, knew Steve far better, and assured Tony that Steve would be so proud of them, and eventually gleeful that his two best friends and greatest loves had found solace and new love in each other.


End file.
